Friday, 14 August 2009

Learning from Rhubarbs


I have come late to the joys of the outdoors, of gardening and of keeping bees. I can't presume to be an expert on these topics. But there are some simple lessons I've learned in my few years of tending gardens, which lead me to wonder if these things cannot also be true of beekeeping.


When I first came to this house in Finchley, I walked out into the garden and noticed a very sad, bedraggled rhubarb plant (although I didn't know then that it was a rhubarb). All I saw was a plant, a living thing, in distress. It consisted of only two leaves which lay half-dead on the ground. It was June, and I wondered why - in the height of summer - this plant should be suffering so.

Then I looked carefully at the ground. And I realised it was as dry as a bone. All it needed was some water.

Four years later, our rhubarb is sometimes known as "The Sacred Cow" and sometimes just as "The Monster". None of us who've lived in this house and know its history, and the story of Nigel - so distressed and damaged, but who loved this house and planted that rhubarb and died tragically in a car accident - none of us, even those who never met him, will ever harm that plant. We love that rhubarb. And we know that it doesn't need the life-giving drink of water quite so much now, as it did the day I first encountered it. It survives, it flourishes and this year, its harvest has spread to our neighbours for the first time ever, in a little ritual that has led to bonding, community and - blow me down - an invitation to my first ever Christening (of my neighbour's baby, you twits, not of me!).

Through the years, I've watched the rhubarb grow incrementally. Over the seasons, one deeply foul and irritating predator has swept through our garden and near-demolished that rhubarb. The hated, the disgusting - SLUG. Well do I remember "Basil's Revenge" when Tina, our fierce red-haired Scottish housemate, reacted in fury to the demolition of our favoured little basil plant by a horde of slugs. Fondly, I recall how she researched every means known to man to destroy the slugs. We spoke wistfully of creating Slug Guns, cannon-like weapons in which we'd hurl piles of slugs and shoot off, over the leylandia trees, into the loud, crass hordes of railway men clanking away on the Tube lines at 3am of a weeknight.

For several seasons, Tina threw down the direst chemicals in her search for a Slug-Devastator. Slowly she came round to a more organic mindset, and looked for less cruel, more natural ways to murder en masse. She created little pools of beer traps, and in the mornings we would find squads of drunken drowned slugs squashed into those pools. Yeeuurrrgh, well do I remember that lot! She'd bucket hundreds of 'em and freeze 'em. We never ever really got to the bottom of how to rid the planet of slugs, although - man - did we try!

But eventually, one day, Tina moved away. Since she left, I've not had the time or the inclination (or the heart) I once had to garden. I miss chatting with her out on the lawn, as we wait for the robins to come visit us at the sound of our voices, directing us imperiously to feed them and their progeny. So the garden has been left to grow a little wilder, a little looser and freer and less suburban. This has benefitted the bees, I know.

But I have also noticed something else. I've looked closely at how my pretty little flowers emerge from their green bases, only to have the tenderest prettiest coloured tips munched down by the Inglourious Basterd Sluggards. And then I've watched again, as the pretty little flowers grow back. And this time - remain untouched.

Why is that?! What have the flowers done to adapt sufficiently to become resilient to slugs? Or is the season of slugs gone past?

One reason, I surmise, is that I have done nothing. I've not put a pellet or a beertrap down in - ohhh - at least a year. And my plants seem to be becoming Slug Resistant.

Which leads me to muse on the nature of nature itself. Is this how nature works? Allow it to be attacked; don't intervene to protect, nurture and ultimately tenderise the plant to a point where it can no longer protect itself?

But isn't that the way of all life, methinks.

And so to bees. I've been reading all about varroa. Those dastardly little creatures that have spread so voraciously worldwide, all due to the intervention of man, to such a point that they are in every beehive in Britain, almost, where two human generations ago, beekeepers knew nothing of such a creature.

Says Philip Chandler, in the paper on Sustainable Beekeeping "We artificially maintain strains of bee that are ill-equipped to deal with infections or infestations, despite their ancestors having done so, unaided, for at least 100 million years."

And I believe he's right. He is RIGHT.

And what that means is, we need to let them be. We need to let the bees fight their own fight against varroa. Perhaps we need to take that heart-breakingly tough decision NOT to medicate against varroa, but, if necessary, allow a hive to die. Sacrifice it in the name of generations that can sustain themselves and their own varroa-resistant future. (To do that, we have to limit our own naturally greedy instincts for commerce, sacrifice the size of the honey crop, limit the returns we try to glean from bees).

And limit our intervention only to the most minimal, the least disruptive of ways. From the rhubarb, I learned to water a little, but leave it to fight its own battle against the predators. So when I read about Drone brood excision or Queen-Arrest ways of manipulating hives, or even Powdered Sugar to manipulate new behaviours into bees, my heart wrenches. It just doesn't feel right!

But I cannot profess to be an expert; I can only trust my instinct. At the very beginning of my beekeeping venture I was tempted to go for a Top Bar hive; the more natural way of keeping a beehive, in which the bees must build their own comb, right from scratch. I was tempted to limit my honey harvest to almost nothing, in the interest of simply hosting a bee hive. But I took a strategic decision to learn the classic modern beekeeping style first, because I truly know nothing of the craft as yet. And I'll see that strategy through.

But while I learn, I will keep pondering and musing, and theorising ...


Thursday, 13 August 2009

Stationery shopping for bees


On Tuesday evening, Guy and I were out and about in the garden. I'd received a cryptic email from my Beekeeping Association about "keeping to Middlesex guidelines" for the end-of-summer parasite inspections of our bees. Quite frankly, I thought those Middlesex guidelines were all about cricket, but then I don't know much about that particular craft either ...


I had spent a bemusing afternoon in Ryman's Stationers. Now, those of you who have a Stationery Fetish like me (you know who you are) would've loved this expedition, considering what the requirements were. The objective was originally to buy double-sided tape, but you know what it's like - you get into a stationery shop and you're surrounded by great new ideas and creative thoughts inundating you on how much better THIS sticky tape or THAT sticky film stuff would be to achieve what it is we're trying to do here.

Which is essentially to cover my Varroa Board with some or other very sticky substance, then slide the board into the tray underneath the open mesh floor of the hive, and leave it there before retrieving it 24 hours later, to count the varroa mites stuck to the surface. Depending on how many mites are trapped there, you make your decision about whether to treat the hive against varroa, or leave it for now.

So eventually I emerged from Ryman's,
laden with double-sided tape, parcel tape (dunno why, but it just looked useful and in the end, it was), clear "Duck" tape (VERY sticky stuff!) and lordy-lordy - school book clear sticky film sheets. The Very Thing!

That night, as me and my usual kak-handedness tried to get this sticky stuff stuck onto the varroa board without taking me with it, Guy had to hold himself back, his frustration at my total lack of practicality steaming at the seams. Eventually he leapt in and said "look here, let me show you!"


"Oi!" yelled I, snatching it all back again "this is MY project! Go and .. oh, go and play in the traffic on your bike, or something!" He flounced off, deeply offended that I
didn't want his help. Immediately I felt guilty, knowing that we've had such a great time up to now with this - our joint project.

Really, we're like a pair of 6-year olds, we are.


So when he got back from his bike ride, stil
l a bit huffy, I hugged him and hauled him outside with me. I decided to suit up to slide the sticky board in under the hive; but didn't bother smoking the hive or anything. Temptation got the better of me, as I couldn't help popping the top of the super off. By Jove! There were thousands of bees in there. Do you think; do you possibly think!?!?! Maybe, just maybe, there'll be a honey harvest for me this year? It's been such an On-Again, Off-Again thing; I hardly know what to think anymore.

So I popped the top back on, and carefully slid the Varroa-Catching Sticky Tray into its slot under the hive. Guy's advice to "edge the sides with parcel tape, so the sides are not sticky and can slide in place better" was spot on. Although I did have a bloody good laugh when I tried to bite the end of the parcel tape off, and realised I couldn't because I had my bee suit veil on. It was a bit of a wedge and a push but the bees were marvellous and hardly even noticed my presence.

So much so that afterwards I sat out under the trees, facing the hive entrance and just watched them for a while. After long, long minutes watching lots of activity, it slowly dawned on me that the entrance was particularly crowded. Bees were fighting each other to gain entrance to the hive. Crowds and crowds were pushing and shoving in and out of the little hole slotted in the centre of the mouse guard. And I wondered again, as I have several times this summer, if I should be leaving that in? Or taking it out? Shouldn't they have more access, and isn't the mouseguard only for winter?

After a few minutes of deliberatio
n, I leaned forward and gently slipped the mouseguard out, leaving a wide new access port directly across the bottom of the hive, a bit like a Star Wars ship docking bay. I watched again for a while and marvelled at the precision of the bees' landing right on target for the old entrance, the edges of which have become worn and darker from the effects of thousands of bees' passage in and out of the hive. I watched as the bees explored the new dimensions of the entrance. And finally I slipped away, leaving them to the end of their working day, and some well-earned rest.

Last night I had a rather riotous night out wit
h the girls after an incredibly tough day at work, so it was only this evening that I could wander down, somewhat hungover, to the hive to follow up on things.

Once again I could approach the hive with no aggression from the bees at all. I slid the tray out, and gazed at the board. Of course, I couldn't see a thing without my glasses. Nowadays, not only do I have contact lenses, I have to wear
reading glasses over them; sunglasses for constant protection in the light, and my optician keeps hounding me to remove my contacts more often and wear my other specs too. So after some fumbling to find the right pair, I popped on the reading glasses and yelled to Guy for his microscope.

"Microscope!? Microscope!?" he yelled back through the doorway to the bedroom, "I don't have a microscope! I wish I did though! Don't you mean a magnifying glass?" Well, of course I did. He has this dinky magnifying glass with two pincer arms which looks like a cute little Michelin man ...


So. On with the reading glasses, gaze through the magnifying glass, trying not to go cross-eyed or give in to the temptation to be violently ill, bring out the reference books, and let's see what all this stuff is on the Varroa-Catching Sticky Stuff.

Shame, you know, when I'd pulled the board out, there were two very shattered looking bees stuck to it also. I managed to brush them off gently - I wonder if they survived. All the rest on the board is debris - it looks like honey-coloured bits of fluff, traces of comb, honey, drips of dark stuff, such a weird range of stuff. And there, in amongst all the honey-coloured material, there I spotted the varroa.

It's hard to be sure, but I gazed and gazed, cross-checked against the books, picked them up and looked closer, took photos and consulted Guy. Eventually we decided that we'd gathered 5 varroa mites in the course of the last 48 hours - not enough to have to take any Varroa Control measures (ie chemical sweep - well, that's a whole nother story).

I stickily used some duct tape to create another Varroa-Catching Sticky trap - cutting myself with a Stanley knife in the process (don't ask), Guy plastering m
e up, and me getting myself so stuck in everything it reminded me of the time I was a nanny and mixed up some fun project with the girls involving chocolate, honey and marshmallows and got so goooey I had doubts I'd ever get free of the stuff ...

I went down to the hive in the evening light, and slid the sticky board back in place. I checked the entrance, and the last few bees flew in from the gathering gloom. They look happy. As I am.

I have phoned and offered to volunteer for the Honey Show. I will be away at Creamfields on the August Bank Holiday so, sadly, I will miss the Enfield Country Autumn Show but I will be at the Enfield Honey Show on the first weekend in September, and am looking forward to it more than I expected.

It's a funny thing to say, but these bees have given me a world of joy away from the Pit of the Corporate Piranhas. They balance so many elements of innocence, of hope for Guy, of pleasure in the summer and the outdoors; they offer me a chance to try out my silly impractical hands in a craft that will hopefully help me become more practical, and they still may give me the one thing I promised my father before he died in May - "Jack's Honey".

Here's hoping!



















A varroa mite in the centre of honey-coloured debris
(left click on the pic to enlarge it for a close-up look)

Thursday, 6 August 2009

Honey is Heavy!


It was such a pleasure to get home from the steambath that is London at the moment; hot, humid, sticky, unbearable London. Sat in the garden with Guy and had a lovely supper with a glass of red wine. I t
hink it was a mistake though, to check on the bees after a glass of wine. I was just a tad squiffy, and the ladies were less than impressed ...

Yeeeouch; two stings through my trousers onto my legs!

I had wondered what sort of progress was happening in the Super; after seeing traces of foundation being drawn out by the bees last time, I had hopes of a little honey harvest. But this time I was disappointed - there has been no change at all. No more drawn-out honeycomb, no honey at all. Aah well!

Onto the brood box, and still - no change on Frame 1. Both sides remain pristine and untouched. They just do not like this frame. I am too new and inexperienced yet to even begin to hazard a guess why. All of the rest of the frames have lots of activity going on; lots and lots of capped brood, lots and lots of fat juicy white larvae waiting for their caps. And some trace of small new rice grain eggs to prove the Queen's presence, alive and well and active, in the hive up to three days ago. But not a lot.

And Frame 10 Side B is simply honey all over; it is the heaviest frame to pick up. Who would've guessed it - honey is heavy!

Some interesting things that I saw during this visit:

  • On one frame, the bees had constructed what looked like a cavern; it almost felt like they were hiding something from view. Again - this is not the first time I have felt this way ...

  • On another frame, some capped drone cells; clearly domed shapes protuding higher than the normal female worker bee capped cells

  • The delight of seeing several female worker bees being born - breaking the cap and carefully and slowly emerging from their cells

  • Strange large droplets of liquid - could it be rain? could it be "sweat" from the heat of the carefully maintained temperature of 35 deg C? Or was it merely nectar or honey?

  • Several small supercedure cells in various places; wonder if I'm meant to do anything at all with these ...
The bees were angry at being disturbed. And it was perhaps too late in the day to be visiting, at 7pm. But Guy was wonderful - brave enough to get close and take a picture of each and every single frame, so that I could scrutinise details close up on the computer screen later that evening.

With stings burning on my legs, I closed up the hive again and retreated to the bedroom to have my wounds checked on, accompanied by some gentle teasing and a great deal of ribald laughter.

This beekeeping can be a
lot of fun!


A perfect frame - capped female worker brood in the centre surrounded by loads of honey supplies around the rim










Frame 10 Side B - just tons and tons of honey












What are the ladies hiding in that little cave?













See the male drone cells? Just left of centre ...















See the female worker bees being born - two of them breaking out of their cells on the right of this picture?















Here too - a female worker bee emerges from her cell on the left of this picture










Saturday, 25 July 2009

Something in the Super!


A
lthough it was late - around 7pm - I thought "let's do it then, old girl" and went off to suit up and battle with That Blasted Smoker. It's been bang on 10 days since my last inspection, and I felt a twinge of trepidation. That made me double up on the gloves and I'm glad I did.

And yet today everything went well. That Blasted Smoker behaved itself immaculately; no trouble at all with lighting it, and it lasted perfectly right through the inspection and died right at the appropriate time. The bees had been busy all day, but seemed quiet as I approached. Smoked the hive, popped the top and crownboard off and peered into the Super.

Awwww, thought I, still empty. I pulled frame 6 out and lo and behold! A little foundation has begun to appear. I had not smeared anything into the frames, like sugar water, to attract the lasses to start working in the super, and I'm glad I didn't now. As I've progressed along through the summer, I'm more and more inclined to be less interfering and simply ease along together with the bees - letting them get on with the job. So the honey harvest from the Super will indeed be a very little, but that's perfectly ok with me. (The only problem now is how to feed the masses - all my mates who've asked for honey! They're just going to have to come and share my one slice of honeyed toast, aren't they!?)

I popped the Super off and went through the Brood Box. Frame 1 is still completely empty and unworked. It's the one closest to the entrance, which surprises me. Frame 2 has some foundation on it, and Frames 3 to 11 are absolutely loaded. I could see tons of honey and pollen. I could see lots and lots of capped brood. I saw lots of fat juicy white larvae. And I saw lots of little white rice grains - brand new eggs. So the Queen is still actively laying; present, safe and busy. I never saw Her, but I know She's there.

All through this brief, smooth, calm inspection the bees buzzed and hummed around me; some stung me (I felt nothing through the double-gloves, although I found at least two stings afterwards. One stung me on my legging - I felt the heat of the sting, but no after effects). But at no stage did they feel as grumpy and peeved as they have seemed the last two visits. The only twinge of nervousness came when my nose brushed against the veil, and I felt a little exposed. This time I walked calmly into the light with each frame and was able to see absolutely clearly, with the evening light shining onto the foundation in front of me - a good idea from Ron and Mary.

The garden is looking chaotic, with the lawn covered in clover flowers, everything wildly overgrown, but the flowers are everywhere. Even my blasted hydrangea has finally flowered - four years of effort on that dang thing.

And our front porch has become a jungly greenhouse, where two of Guy's tomato plants have fruit. As yet, no chilli - Don and Tam are way ahead of us on that one!

Guy's bought a bicycle and has headed off to Tesco. I'm envious! This has been a great summer so far ...





Wednesday, 15 July 2009

Captain's Log - Star Date 15.07.2009 18:08


I continue to go where no Bekkering has been before. Perhaps not quite so boldly as when I first started, but our journey continues, and it continues to present me with mystifying and wondrous sights.


To summarise today's expedition:

Objective: to ensure the Queen continues to have enough room to keep laying.

Hidden Agenda: I wonder if the ladies have started drawing foundation and storing any honey in the super!?

Having wrestled with That Blasted Smoker again, and pitched 3,000 matches all over the garden for good measure, I bravely ventured down to the bottom of the garden in my bee suit once more. I find myself filled with a mixture of emotions this time, and strangely a reluctance to keep disturbing my little friends in their home. I am also, I ruefully admit to myself, a little scared. I hate myself for my fear, and use this anger to steam up That Blasted Smoker and make sure the hive is smoked thoroughly.

I pop off the roof, crownboard and super. It's empty - my heart drops a bit. I find about a hundred bees sat firmly on the Queen Excluder. They do not take well to me brushing them off as I remove the Excluder. I hear the ominous rising hum with a bit of an inward quiver. Coward, I think to myself, get on with it, you twerp!

I'll describe what I see in the brood box, frame by frame. I call the frame closest to the Entrance - Frame 1, sides A and B.

Frame 1, sides A and B: completely empty. One or two bees, no foundation, no action whatsoever.

Frames 2 - 9, sides A and B: humming and chock-solid with bees. Classic pattern of honey round the top third, capped brood all over the rest of the frame - full to the brimming. Some fat white larvae to be seen, some rice-grain eggs but not as many as I expected. But lots and lots and lots of capped brood. Some of the cells that appear to have rice-grains in them are black, which seems strange to me. Also in one of them, I think I see two rice grains. Sign of a missing Queen; worker bees attempting to lay? But I am loathe to assume the worst this time - I'm aware of the mystery of all the things I am seeing.

I see no sign of the Queen at all, but I do see two or three Queen cells being constructed - am I imagining it or are the ladies crawling all over these in layers thick enough to appear to be hiding these from me!?

Frame 10, Side A: all honey. No brood, nothing but honey from top to bottom, side to side.

Frame 10, Side B: foundation being pulled in the centre, with some honey. No brood yet.

Frame 11, Side A: ditto

Frame 11, Side B: a couple of bees appear to be starting to pull a little foundation.

No honey on the Super frames. I read somewhere that the bees sometimes need a little incentive to start working in the Super; like a smear of honey on one of the frames. I'm aware I haven't been focusing a lot on learning, reading, researching my bee venture, so inwardly I make a commitment to read up on this.

Halfway through my Inspection, That Blasted Smoker dies on me. So too does my phone camera (my other camera is in for repairs; don't tell Guy but I ended up stepping on it by mistake during my last Bee Inspection. Oops! However, he is so lovely, he arranged to send it off for repairs as it's still under warranty - what a honey xx). So I have to stump off down the garden to the Halfway Station and re-light That Blasted Smoker, which proceeds to smoke up the hive, the garden and the laundry for at least the next hour. Foul thing!

During my Inspection, I felt distinct pangs of fear and nerves going through the frames. Those stings have been a bit of a hard lesson, what what. I have been wearing much tougher gloves, but every now and then I felt my face brush the front of my veil and felt completely exposed and scared about being stung. I hate my own fear! The ladies definitely stung my gloves this time; I could feel my little finger feeling warm but not sore, and it was intriguing to go and sit down at the Halfway Station across the garden and look at my gloves, pulling out the stings that had been left in them and inspecting the venom pumping system on the sting up close.

I was relieved to close up the hive; I placed the Queen Excluder on upside-down to how it had previously been placed and could feel where the propolis left on it bumped along, misaligned. I should have flipped it over, but wanted to close up quickly so left it as it was. Super back on, and crownboard and roof back on too. This time I made sure to gently bump any bees off, to try and avoid crushing them.

This time the bees were also not as charming and accommodating as they were in the early days; I just feel so klutzy and interfering; I feel tempted to allow them to manage more by themselves. As bees have done, after all, successfully for thousands of years without some kak-handed StarTrekkie like myself ...

Captain's Log - Out.

Monday, 13 July 2009

Bee Day out


I spent Sunday morning at Woodcroft Wildspace, where the Beekeeper Association that I belong to is involved in developing a new apiary. These are the things I love about Londoners; that they love wild spaces so much, they volunteer their personal time to help turn any small abandoned space in London back into "wild space", and that they love to get out into the green spaces (like me), where you can lie back in meadow g
rass and look up at the cloud shapes in the sky, or walk through wild paths where tennis courts have been reclaimed by nature, to go blackberry-picking or bird-watching.

It was so lovely to see a wild meadow with children running through waist-high grasses, and to see Fred herding a group of children in a delightfully chaotic version of the bottom-waggling bee-dance ...






































In the meantime, back at home, I've kept a careful distance, keeping my well-stung nose out of the Bee Hive busy-ness. I've been dropping in to take a look at their activities every morning and evening and noticed that, after a couple of weeks of no pollen, the bees appear to be stuffing their little baskets full again. So we are all gathering clean, empty glass pots - ever hopeful of a small honey harvest this summer.

I will check the hive again on Wednesday evening - the day before I start my new job. I hope there's honey in the super! M and R have also suggested I keep a jar aside to submit in the Novice section of the Enfield Association's Honey Show.

Those of you who know me well must be loving this; me - the one who never liked the domestic arts - cooking, cleaning, gardening. The one who liked to travel; drift around the world, never settling, new adventures on every horizon, always preferring the life of the unconventional Bohemian.

Welcome to my new Bohemia :)


Monday, 6 July 2009

Possible new winner of A Darwin Award*


I have been forced to tell this story. I really didn't want this to get out. It's so very undignified. Really, it wasn't my fault.

After all, how was I to know that my prolonged inspection of the morning would piss the lasses off quite so badly?! How was I to know that thunder lurking about in the background would make the ladies even more peeved on top of that!? And honestly, how was I to know that sticking my face up so close the mouseguard would precipitate so much disaster and misfortune!?!?

What turned out to be the most swollen, lumpy afternoon of my life got even worse when I realised I was due to get new passport photos the next day.

Who knew that two small stings - one on my forehead, and one on the tip of my nose - would swell to such engorged proportions?! And why couldn't they have stung on my lips instead, so I could have bee-stung lips like Angelina Jolie's?! Or Mick Jagger ...

It's a relief, at least, to know that no one will ever recognise me from my passport photos. The only problem now is - will I ever be allowed to cross a border again, with that passport!?

* Darwin Awards